Trust versus worry

When I was a kid, I never once worried about whether my dad would be able to pay the bills every month. I never worried about school fees, or if we’d eat supper that day. I just run off to school every morning and did kid stuff. Even when things were lean (and I use that term generously), I didn’t spend my day thinking, I wonder if dad will come through for me. He is my dad - he took care of things, he took care of us.

So why is it that now when I’m older, I pray about things to my Heavenly Father and still worry about whether He will come through? Why am I anxious about these plans or that decision? My Heavenly Father created heaven, earth and all that is in them. He is “able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that I could ever ask or think”. Jesus says in the gospels that the Father knows what we need. So why do I take my concerns to Him in prayer, and then take them right back? He is my Father - He will take care of things, He takes care of me.

nowfollowing…

Last night, some friends and I went to see this house/jazz fusion band playing in Cape Town. As these things go, we went to a club afterwards. I don’t go out a lot anymore, so when I do, I prefer it to be fun.

But as I was dancing to these songs and singing, I stopped for a second and listened to the words - these were/are words that I use to praise my Lord, the Most High God - to say I love You, there is no one above You - and yet here I was using the same words to sing about “love”, alcohol, money. I was so convicted by a feeling of not being genuine about my love for Christ at all.

Joshua 24:14-15 reads:

14 “Now fear the Lord and serve him with all faithfulness. Throw away the gods your ancestors worshiped beyond the Euphrates River and in Egypt, and serve the Lord. 15 But if serving the Lord seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your ancestors served beyond the Euphrates, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.”

Now, I know I wasn’t doing anything immoral, but I was singing along to songs that glorify the immoral. And I certainly wasn’t doing anything to glorify God or to bring me closer to Him. This faith isn’t a long list of do’s and don’ts - I think God just wants us to realise that what we have in Him is better and more real.

Paul puts it wonderfully (as always) in 1 Corinthians 10 when he talks about our freedom as Christians:

23 “Everything is permissible,” you say—but not everything is beneficial. “Everything is permissible”—but not everything is constructive… 31 So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.

The worst part is that while I felt that I didn’t belong in that club, my actions had (for a while) cost me the closeness that I usually enjoy with God in prayer and worship. Lukewarm is a horrible feeling.

I had to choose who to follow. I thank God for that slap in the face last night. And I’m not saying Christians should be recluse party-poopers - but I learnt last night, that even when I’m having fun I want to be certain that it’s not going to pull me away from God. 

God knows that the renewal of our minds is not easy, and He doesn’t expect us to do it of our own strength. For this, we have been given grace.

…Therefore, anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God. 5 Or do you think Scripture says without reason that the Spirit He caused to dwell in us longs jealously? 6 But he gives us more grace. (James 4)
I pray for grace.
Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you can understand what He is doing. He is getting the drains right and stopping the leaks in the roof and so on; you knew that those jobs needed doing and so you are not surprised. But presently He starts knocking the house about in a way that hurts abominably and does not seem to make any sense. What on earth is He up to? The explanation is that He is building quite a different house from the one you thought of - throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards. You thought you were being made into a decent little cottage: but He is building a palace. He intends to come and live in it Himself.

CS Lewis - Mere Christianity

I posted this quote about a month ago, but only now do I understand Lewis’ meaning.

the Jesus standard

12 We do not dare to classify or compare ourselves with some who commend themselves. When they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves with themselves, they are not wise….

17 But, “Let the one who boasts boast in the Lord.” 18 For it is not the one who commends himself who is approved, but the one whom the Lord commends.

1 Corinthians 10

Other ‘Christian’ girls may watch the same movies, listen to the same music, wear the same clothes, and have all the same pop culture addictions as the rest of the world with just slightly higher morals tacked on. But God has called us to a higher standard-the very standard of Jesus Christ. And I believe it’s time we become worthy of the calling we have received.
Leslie Ludy (Set-Apart Femininity: God’s Sacred Intent for Every Young Woman)

(via be-forever-beautifulxx)

Source: set-apartgirl